20 years……….

This Summer is a biggie..

I graduated Highschool 20 years ago…

I got Lyme disease 20 years ago..

BIG…

just sit on THAT a minute…

ok maybe not a whopping 60 seconds but… you have to admit that each of those things carries a BIT of weight with them.. Highschool… has it’s fun memories, but … there IS the FLIPside to that coin… isn’t there… hmmm and when you HAVE lyme disease.. ya frankly just don’t remember all that much to begin with.. so DO YOU go to that reunion.. or … don’t you….??????? will they all like you, or were you the class BRAT?

hmmm

Well for obvious reasons…. (obvious you wonder..? yes! obvious.. $$$$.. we have none 🙂 remember darling reader!) I opted NOT to go to the BIG Tadoo Reunion…. and was feeling a bit blue about it… actually, BUT ever the optimist, I paid CLOSE attention to the “reunion page” on face book..

why?

PEOPLE were coming in from OUT of town… and when people fly in from OUT of town.. they like to get together for MORE than just ONE silly night… so.. I waited.. and JUST as I suspected… a “pre-reunion” party was planned… FREE at a really nice place… buy your own drinks, and come as you are… (just my speed!) Hubby and I marked our calendars and it was a DATE NIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Date nights are NOT easy… especially with LYME… (and all those other blasted illnesses..)

I am NOT complaining. I am just SAYING.. I REMEMBER easy, and they aren’t THAT, anymore 🙂

Easy is dropping the kids OFF with their clothes, toothbrushes and jammies and kissing them night night 🙂

at Oma’s and Opa’s… or sticking chicken nuggets/pizza in the oven and handing the movie and the popcorn to the sitter along with the list of emergency #’s, bed times, and NOT to do’s in my house and leaving for my date …

What my day DID look like

6 am take meds go back to sleep

7:00 Baby wakes for feeding (Thank you to Princess who is helping today with this! 🙂 you ROCK!)

7:45 wake again and convince SELF to get out of bed

8:00 go down for coffee .. begin medicine list & explanation for Oma & Opa

8:15 Interrupted by Buddy who is starving “to death” and needs food

8:40 back to Medicine list /have kids pack clothing for tomorrow & jammies

9:00 Done with first kid’s list (yes after that many interuptions.. just one kids down, 2 to go)

NEED more coffee

9:30 Finished 2nd Medicine list (but now it IS medicine time)

10:00 Starting 3rd kids list ooops time to feed Baby

10:25 Starting 3rd kids list again

11:00 Start packing food for Kids dinner/pizza pans needed/ begin making enough bottles.. C.S. helping 🙂

12: call Gail for emotional reinforcements…………. PRAYER!

1:00 Shower/hair?/makeup/dress

1:35 assess…. food for children with supplies to cook/ meds packed w/lists for children, supplements for children, clothing for sleep & tomorrow, diapers, wipes, extra baby clothing, pacifiers, toys, baby food, teethers, blankets, burpclothes, bumpo, bibs, spoons, bowls, bottles, toothbrushes with toothpaste because of MCS issues…. (head spinning…. sit down)

Check bag, do I HAVE, lipstick, is my make up on, mascara, deoderant, did I bring extra (thank you malaria sucks! Wipes incase I start to smell… ??? yes in the bag) ok… pony tail holder incase I start sweating REALLY bad, pain meds in case my migraine hits, yes it is there, sun glasses in case photophobia hits… (where any light hurts my eyes even at night) yes they are there.. ok… I am packed

2:00 We are set and the Van seems FULL….

By 2:35 we arrive and I WANT TO NAP

but The Party is at 7… and even though that SEEMS like a long time away…

I need to visit

then leave by

3:45 leave and hit Starbucks for Caffeine (yes that is cheating but WHAT ever!)

Call M.J. for moral and prayerful support – this is emotional.. who needs this much time to go on a date?

4:30 Pick up Rob & He shows me his new Project at work 🙂

5:00 Start looking for dinner… ok wow NOT as easy as it would seem in Schaumburg traffic when you are gluten free…………. NO not easy AT ALL

6:10 Arrive at Cooper’s Hawk for a FABULOUS Dinner (yes they have a GF Menu, but we didn’t even know that! we just had given UP! and wanted to get close to the event!)

7:25 We show up late (fashionably late) to the EVENT and had… a BLAST at my 20 year highschool reunion………

really.

I didn’t expect it to be so fun. I never, in my wildest dreams expected the people I ran into to be so genuine, so kind and funny, so wonderful. I am so thankful I went. You see, my memories are so blurry, so faded, so few.. I remember more from gradeschool, from jr.high, and I went… really I went because many of THOSE people would be there. Perhaps, it was just the Lord guiding me from one kind soul to another, but what ever it was I am thankful… I had a grand time. I laughed, and saw faces I remembered, even when the names that went with them escaped me…

I saw beautiful souls, that have lived a lifetime, who have lifetimes yet to live. Souls that don’t know, anymore than I do, where the years have gone. Twenty years seemed nearly an eternity to us twenty years ago, and today it is but the blinking of an eye, the flapping of the wing of butterfly, beautiful, but all together too quick.

And so was the night. Like Cinderella my coach turns back into a pumpkin at about midnight, my “Self” into rags when the clock strikes… as much as I wanted to pretend the symptoms away, my Knight saw them, and was watching me carefully… I had to start sitting, leaning, holding on to things when ever I was chatting with friends.. My pals didn’t want for me to go, and I didn’t want to leave either, feeling much like Rob was the big mean “fatherly type”… They pleaded a bit for me to be able to stay, and he lovingly stayed firm, with out giving cause only saying, that it was midnight…

As we walked to the car… The music quite faded in the backround, the friends gone on inside, just him and I, alone in our illness, the darkness held back by the streetlights, I saw how much laughter, song, remembering, friends, helped me not THINK about how much I hurt. Because I could truly barely get to the car. I had trouble inside, but because there had been a crowd, no one had noticed, they all just walked … slowly with me, chatting, and laughing, so much… that even I could pretend… but here. here, I could not…

It was then that I looked at Rob and knew…

Part of me was thankful, and he nodded… and smiled and helped me along. Part of me was mad.

I didn’t want to admit it was this bad. NOT yet. Not so soon. I don’t like freezing up, I don’t like when my hands freeze into positions and I can not use them the way I want… I don’t like it when my body feels like this at all….I didn’t want to admit… the truth that it would be so much worse to have this happen in FRONT of people.

My hero keeps things like that from happening… 🙂

By 2pm Insomnia finally fell to bay and let me sleep

6am up for meds

7am up because baby would have been up, & head hurts .. I need meds 4 it.

8am time for coffee……….. call my guy, and thank him……..

time to consider a new plan for babysitting

20 years ago I got lyme disease…….. 20 years ago… I graduated from highschool…….

I can still be a brat……. I still need a hero……. and thankfully I have one 🙂

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About sweetnika

Home Educator, Loving Wife, Born again Christian, decorating, photogaphing, blogging, reading adventurer, off on an exciting new adventure!
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